Hearts were broken all over the world recently when Elizabeth Gilbert announced her separation from her husband Jose after 12 years of being together.
The news travelled fast and was all over social media in just one short hour after her eloquent post on Facebook:
"Dear Ones -
Because I have shared details of my private life with you all so intimately over the years, I feel the need to share with you this recent change in my personal life.
I am separating from the man whom many of you know as "Felipe" — the man whom I fell in love with at the end of the EAT PRAY LOVE journey. He has been my dear companion for over 12 years, and they have been wonderful years. Our split is very amicable. Our reasons are very personal."
The comments began flying in and, although many were sympathetic and filled with love and support, there were also many more which expressed broken hopes and dreams for creating love in their own lives because of this separation.
My own heart broke when I started reading comments such as this:
“Do you know how often I think ‘at least there’s that one person with that one amazing journey who found forever in love in an unlikely place!’ I quit!"
I thought to myself, I have got to do something about the faulty beliefs we have about LOVE.
It seems that what we expect love to be, and how it should be expressed has become so twisted for so many and we are becoming so bitter.
In her book Big Magic, Elizabeth talks about inspiration being a force of its own and never promises you anything except asking, “Do you want to take a ride?”
Inspiration does not promise to pay the bills, solve your life’s problems and take away your worries…it promises an adventurous ride. I believe the same can be said for love.
See, love does not promise you forever with another, it also does not promise to pay your bills, or solve your life’s problems; very often LOVE adds more problems and bills…just ask Tom! I remind him often: “Baby, I am worth it!”
But what love DOES promise is an unforgettable ride of discovery, experience, and expansion of life.
I can now hear the words of the late Leo Buscaglia, one of my favorite authors on Love:
“As soon as the love relationship does not lead me to me, as soon as I in a love relationship do not lead another person to himself, this love, even if it seems to be the most secure and ecstatic attachment I have ever experienced, is not true love. For real love is dedicated to continual becoming.”
This is the purpose and mission of LOVE: to bring about the continual becoming of YOU!
Love is the best way to grow, to live and experience life.
AND
If you are going to answer the call of love…get ready, it is going to be an unforgettable ride!!
So please don’t quit on love!
It is not always about being with someone forever; it is about expanding yourself and growing a magnificent you for a glorious life!
And when our relationships come “to an end” as we like to say in our modern world…love does not leave, it grows and transforms into something different.
Only, we don’t talk about how love transforms into something else. We instead try to pretend the relationship never happened and we work hard to cut it out of our experience and move on hopeful to the next…all the while thinking this will solve the pain caused from loving!
The pain that comes from loving is our disappointment for what once was, and for what might have been. It is not the absence of LOVE. If love was absent, you would not feel disappointed; you would feel indifferent.
When you have loved and been loved by another, and your relationship comes to an end, it is so OK to continue to love and appreciate things about your past relationship. Yes, even if you are in a different relationship now with someone else.
The pain caused from loving is increased when loving is suspended, and the pain caused from loving is decreased by loving more. Do your best to find value from each person you have experienced feelings of love with…and be diligent in nurturing the love that is in your life right now. Be grateful for LOVE’S presence, and if it becomes time for love to transform, quickly reach for LOVE elsewhere. For love is abundantly everywhere.
Elizabeth and Jose, I celebrate your love, and I honor the life you have shared and created together. It has touched and inspired so many of us to believe and reach for love again. And now, as your relationship grows into something different, may we all be reminded that love continues on in our hearts even though it may transform.
Thank you both for your courage to share yourselves with the world. Our hearts are with you now as we send you back some of the love you so freely gave.
For the rest of you, go now and experience some LOVE! Tell someone you love them! Do it now, don’t wait!
And by the way….I LOVE YOU!
Sending you loads of extraordinary love that tingle your toes, and the power to create it!
Would this blog post be helpful to a friend or family member or an old boyfriend or girlfriend? Is there someone that could use some love from you?
Please…pass it along. We all need a little love & support from time to time.
Listen to the audio version of this blog here.
To have this blog delivered to your inbox, along with early bird specials and bonuses only for our subscribers join us here:
If you liked this post, please let us know! Inspire others by leaving a comment down below…